Hilarious Blonde Jokes
A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it, because the car had 250,000 miles on it. One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with at a salon.
The brunette told her, “There is a possibility to make the car easier to sell, but it’s not legal.”
“That doesn’t matter,” replied the blonde, “if I only can sell the car.”
“Okay,” said the brunette. “Here is the address of a friend of mine. He owns a car repair shop. Tell him I sent you and he will turn the counter in your car back to 50,000 miles. Then it should not be a problem to sell your car.”
The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic. About one month after that, the brunette asked the blonde, “Did you sell your car?”
“No,” replied the blonde, “why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it.”
Tags: timewaster, fun, interesting, humour, haha, funread, funny
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As the priest was leaving his church after the service, he accidentally bumped a gorgeous blonde parishioner, knocking her left tit with his elbow.
I m so sorry, the priest gushed. Then after a moment of hesitation added, But I m sure that if your heart is as soft as your breast, there s a place for you in heaven.
Well, said the blonde, if your cock s as hard as your elbow, we should go into those bushes and fuck!
Tags: blonde jokes, humor, humour, comedy, entertainment, funny, cool
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A blonde walked into a hairdresser’s with a pair of headphones on and asked the hairdresser for a haircut - but “don’t touch the headphones o.k.?”
“Fine” said the hairdresser - a little taken aback - but happy for the work. Three weeks later, the same blonde returned and asked for another haircut but with the same condition:
“Whatever you do … don’t touch the headphones” “No problem” said the hairdresser who went on to give her another good cut, considering the restraint.
Three weeks later, the same thing happened “and don’t forget - don’t touch the headphones” said the blonde.
Well, just as the hairdresser was finished, she couldn’t resist and she just lifted one side of the headphones up. The blonde promptly fell stone dead on the floor of the shop. “Oh my God - I think I’ve killed her” screamed the hairdresser. She picked up the headphones and put them on herself. She heard the strangest thing… “breathe in…breathe out… breathe in…breathe out.”
Tags: laugh, bored, timewaster, funread, awesome, interesting, humour
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A blonde goes into an appliance store looking for a TV. After a few minutes, she picks one out and approaches the salesman.
“I want to buy this television,” she says.
The salesman replies, “Sorry, we don’t serve blondes here.”
She gets mad, leaves and goes home. She dyes her hair brown and returns to the store. “I want to buy this television.” she says to the salesman.
She gets the same response; “Sorry miss, we don’t serve blondes here.”
She leaves again, frustrated. She goes home and proceeds to shave her head, eyebrows and all, leaving no visible trace of blonde hair on her head. Upon returning to the store, she once again approaches the salesman. “Sir, I would like to purchase this television, and I don’t want any problems.”
To which the salesman replies, “Sorry Miss, we don’t serve blondes.”
Fed up with this, she cries, “How can you tell that I am blonde? I have dyed my hair and even resorted to shaving my head!”
To which the salesman replied, “Well, Miss, that television you are trying to buy is a microwave!”
Tags: bored, entertainment, laugh, funny, haha, timewaster, best
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A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, We were the first in space! The American said, We were the first on the moon! The Blonde said, So what, we re going to be the first on the sun! The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. You can t land on the sun, you idiot! You ll burn up! said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, We re not stupid, you know. We re going at night!
Tags: funny, comedy, silly, joke, interesting, humor, blonde
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